The Old Man and the Swamp: A True Story About My Weird Dad, a Bunch of Snakes, and One Ridiculous Road Trip

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The The Old Man and the Swamp: A True Story About My Weird Dad, a Bunch of Snakes, and One Ridiculous Road Trip It's feature Sellers: Well, let’s see. Whenever I open the freezer to grab a bag of Ore-Ida tater tots now—which is embarrassingly often—I have to take a deep breath and say my mantra five times, my mantra being "Frozen tater tots are not dead blue racers."

Halpern: His wedding gift to you was a worthless baseball card. Which player was it?

Halpern: You normally write about entertainment. What made you want to tell a more personal story?

Halpern: Your dad has a severe stutter. So he'll be played by Colin Firth in the movie adaptation?

Halpern: You have always been squeamish about outdoors, but you followed your dad into the swamp anyway. Was going far outside of your comfort zone to bond with him ultimately worth it?

Sellers: It was a 1985 Tom Brookens card. In his defense, it does have some value. Last I checked, it was up to 83 cents! But his wedding gift to me is nothing. He once gave one of his friends a homegrown zucchini, along with a note that read "Behold the fruits of the earth." My cousin received a fake shark’s tooth. He also once wrapped up a Snickers bar and gave it to my mom as a Christmas present—the only gift he gave her that year. Can you believe they’re divorced?

Sellers: One thing you need to know about my dad is that he smells like a mix of Skin Bracer aftershave lotion and an ashtray. Firth is an amazing actor who has nobly done much to bring attention to the plight of stutterers, but he conjures up images of roses and orange marmalade. I don’t think even someone of his talents could pull off that kind of transformation.

Sellers: The compelling strangeness of my dad could no longer be ignored, as he has only gotten more eccentric through the years. Read More>>

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The The Old Man and the Swamp: A True Story About My Weird Dad, a Bunch of Snakes, and One Ridiculous Road Trip Description

I have nothing against snakes, provided that they're hundreds of miles away from me. And I have nothing against my dad, given the same set of conditions.

In a fit of questionable judgment, consummate indoorsman John Sellers tags along on a journey to search for snakes with his eccentric, aging father--an obsessive fan of Bob Dylan, a giver of terrible gifts, a drinker of boxed wine, a minister- turned-heretic, and, most importantly, the self-designated guardian of the threatened copperbelly water snake.

The quest is their fumbling attempt to reconnect. Decades of bitterness, substance abuse, acrimonious divorce, and divergent opinions about personal hygiene have conspired to make the two estranged. Sellers has just begun to develop a new appreciation for the American wilderness, and all the slithering creatures that populate it, when his father's deteriorating health thwarts their mission and disturbs their tentative peace. Determined to finish what they started, he ventures back into the swamp-- alone, but more connected to his dad than ever.

With big-hearted humor and irreverence, The Old Man and the Swamp tells the story of a father who always lived on his own terms and the son who struggled to make sense of it all.

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